How to use sex tech for edging and orgasm control

How to use sex toys for edging

If you thought standard orgasms were something special… Just wait till you learn about this. 

Whether you’re looking to maximise your orgasmic potential, experience multiple orgasms, control your ejaculation, or want to dominate a partner in the bedroom, edging and orgasm control are tools you can put in your belt to help get you there. While they may take practice and patience, the pleasure can be utterly worth the wait. 

What is edging & orgasm control? 

Edging is the mode where you build up your arousal near to the “point of no return”, let yourself cool down for a bit, and then repeat the process. You can do this as many times as you please, until you want to tip over into orgasmic release. 

Orgasm control is also a way to describe edging (as you are indeed “controlling” your orgasm), but it encompasses much more. Orgasm control also includes practices such as: denial and permission, forced orgasms, and post-orgasm torture. 

Bearing in mind these are all under the ongoing agreement of consent, and the pre-scene negotiation of boundaries, limits, and safe words. 

edging blog post

Why would you do edging & orgasm control? 

As previously mentioned you might want to expand your orgasmic experience, such as creating stronger, longer lasting orgasms. Just like practicing your kegels, these techniques can also help people who struggle with erectile dysfunction or rapid (also known as premature) ejaculation. 

Trying something different usually helps to get a different result, and while the result or goal is typically the climax, edging and orgasm control tends to also focus on the process of pleasure and not just the “goal”. Along with breathing exercises (which we’ll go into further down), edging and orgasm control can help to spread orgasmic energy through your entire body. 

Not to mention the intimacy and relationship wellbeing benefits it can create when you practice this with a partner. Introducing a BDSM power dynamic into your sexual routine has been found to have a positive impact on people’s mental health. 

Are there any concerns when it comes to edging & orgasm control?

Of course, like in any sexual scenario, you have to be aware of people’s limits. But particularly when it comes to practices that involve non-consensual consent, where people have agreed to the act, but during will struggle, fight, and resist. This is because forced multiple orgasms can create discomfort from being overstimulated and too sensitive. Nevertheless, until the safeword is said or another non-verbal sign previously agreed upon is made, the act shall continue and all parties are ideally left sexually satisfied afterwards. Communication is key, and it’s always worth checking in after to see what worked or didn’t work for next time. 

In the case of orgasm denial, through edging or the withholding of someone’s pleasure, there might be concerns around “blue balls” or “blue vulva”. These are not as dangerous as many people think. What happens is the build up without release can cause the blood to stay in the genitals and in rare cases turn a tinge of blue. With time, the blood will naturally flow back into the body as normal, or with orgasmic release. 

How to practice edging & orgasm control with sex tech

Whether you’re on your own or with a partner, sex tech can help with your edging and orgasm control. 

During self-pleasure, practice not touching your genitals and only having vibrating or suction nipple clamps seeing how long you can last. Or try this turbo suction tongue clitoral vibrator for the ultimate test. Use remote controlled sex toys to bring your vibration intensity up and then back down before you tip over into orgasm. Rinse, and repeat. 

Smart cock rings are really fun for prolonging erections. This is because the blood is being held in the penis. If you use a cock and ball ring, by keeping the balls away from the body, you can inhibit ejaculation. However, make sure you aren’t wearing them for longer than 30 minutes at a time as this could 

Try tying up your partner using bed restraints, with a smart sex toy on their genitals at the ready. Even better apply the vibrations to their whole body, avoiding their genitals completely, until they’re begging for more. Once they’re cumming (depending on whether you agreed upon orgasm torture before the scene) you could give them forced multiple orgasms. 

Thrusting masturbators could also be a great tool for forcing orgasms on a partner while tied up and helpless! 

If you’re in a long distance relationship, you could deny your partner’s orgasms for as long as you wish, and when you decide, command them to wear a wifi-controlled panty or butt vibrator which you can control from wherever in the world. Stimulating them throughout the day as you please. 

As long as you are communicating consent and safe words before and during edging and orgasm control, you can have a lot of fun putting trust into someone else’s hands. For those doing it by yourself, have fun with the amount of pleasure your body can experience. 

What are some expert technique for edging & orgasm control? 

Urologist James H. Semans in 1956 created the “Stop Start” technique (today known as edging) to help people with premature ejaculation, which is basically stroking the penis until you feel the urge to ejaculate, then stop, relax, repeat. 

In the 70s Sex Researcher’s Masters and Johnson adapted this with the “Stop Squeeze” technique, where you place the thumb on the frenulum and the fore and middle fingers on the other size, squeezing for up to 30 seconds, allowing for the penis to lose 30% of the erection, before stimulating it again. Repeating the process up to 5 times. 

orange squeeze

Sexologist, Chantelle Otten, shares that for people with vulvas, it’s best to build up arousal by touching different body parts before your genitals to awaken erotic sensations. Using a scale of 1-10 with 10 being orgasm, she says the idea is to build up to an 8, bring down to a 5, and repeat x4 (or as much as you like) till you’re ready for the climactic 10.  

Pleasure-based Sex Educator, Kait Scalisi, recommends specific breathing techniques to slow down the chance of orgasm. As arousal builds, our breath quickens or even stops, which helps to induce an orgasm. “Deeper breathing can help us achieve deeper, stronger and longer-lasting orgasms,” as well as slowing down the experience. Try visualising the pleasure spreading around your body with every breath. 

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